My Journey thus far

You Don`t see what I see,

 That’s ok by me! 

By Vicky Humphrey

 Spiritual Experiences in my life

A journey of my life path in this lifetime, where intuition walked with me throughout my life knowingly or at times unknowingly.

Trusting my intuition and the guidance from others unseen.

We all carry our own beliefs and when they harm none should be honoured and valued as the guidance in your everyday life.

Walking in the light, seeing the light where there is darkness, lighting the path to where? Where does this light lead me? Wondering, always wondering.

As I make my way to bed approaching the bed and gazing out into the darkness. My eyes adjust and the white glow that surrounds the trees, lights up the valley. It is time to rest and enter the night realm where all is safe, and the lessons gather. 

The light has always guided me, revealing paths hidden to others, where intuition whispers truths that seem to emerge from nowhere. It is not just the tangible glow that illuminates the valley at night but the unseen brilliance of insight and knowing that carries me forward. Each step feels like an unspoken dialogue with the universe, threading moments together with a sense of purpose, even when shrouded in doubt. The lessons learned from the shadows and the unexpected twists have painted a mosaic of resilience, one where trust becomes the compass. As I reflect on this journey, the soft echoes of past lives seem to linger—memories that aren’t fully mine but resonate deeply, steering my course with instincts born of experiences long forgotten yet undeniably felt. 

My journey in this life thus far, has been that of trusting through all my experiences. 

As a child, you are unaware that those you see may not be visible to others, so you never feel alone. 

Trusting my own senses has served me well, not always knowing all the facts but trusting in the feelings and thoughts, has brought a sense of peace and although life changing upheaval at times,this has given me the opportunity to see those moments for what they are and to not be caught in the emotional roller coaster.

The light that guides me seems woven into every corner of my life, from moments of quiet introspection to vivid memories of days spent exploring the world around me. It is not merely a beacon ahead but an intricate tapestry of wisdom, intuition, and experiences that stretch beyond the tangible. This light, akin to a companion, has illuminated the beauty and complexity of human connections, revealing truths in the subtleties of gestures and unspoken words. It has taught me to embrace the contrasts in life—joy and sorrow, simplicity and chaos—and to find balance within them. Through each chapter of my journey, I have discovered a resilience that thrives in uncertainty, drawing strength from the unseen forces that seem to whisper guidance in moments of doubt. Trusting in these whispers has allowed me to navigate the twists and turns of life with a sense of clarity, even when the answers have yet to reveal themselves. 

 The bystander, watching from outside seeing it for what it truly is. Truth never hides itself and always finds its way. For those that have feared me, I feel they have always had something to hide. Then more times than not it is revealed eventually and I thank the trusting and knowing feelings for justifying why I had seen it or thought their behaviour or actions to be wrong. Listen to the gut feelings you initially get in a situation or person they are there for a reason.

As the night deepens, I find myself wrapped in thoughts of the paths I’ve tread, both earthly and ethereal, each illuminated by fleeting yet profound moments of clarity. My life feels like an intricate dance between the tangible and the unseen, where intuition often intersects with the rhythms of the everyday—a guiding force unyielding yet tender. The lessons gathered from both joy and challenge seem to layer themselves like sediment, creating a foundation rich with meaning and resilience. The whispers in the dark, the subtle threads of connection, and the echoes of lives that may not be fully mine all converge in this space, stirring a quiet sense of wonder that stays with me, even as I prepare to step into the realm of rest and dreams. 

Nightcaps

Nightcaps was more than just a geographical starting point; it was a cradle of imagination and intuition, where the surrounding hills and mining legacy seemed to whisper stories of resilience and unseen wonders. In that small town, the rhythms of daily life intermingled with moments of unspoken reflection, offering lessons embedded in both the physical and the intangible—the quiet hum of family bonds, the texture of earth beneath one’s feet, and the fleeting glimpses into realms not entirely of this world. These threads of connection, woven in the fabric of my childhood, cultivated an enduring sense of curiosity and trust in the energies that shaped my path forward. It was in these formative years, surrounded by the echoes of a land both nurturing and mysterious, that I learned to listen—to the land, to the whispers of intuition, and to the unfolding narrative of life that would later guide me through new landscapes and encounters as we moved to Clyde. 

 Starting my life's journey in Nightcaps, a small mining and farming town, was a time of connection with family. As my Mum had a large family and I had many cousins to play with. My Dads family was smaller with just him and his sister and my Mum was one of nine.As we settled into the rhythms of our life in Nightcaps, the contrast between the comforting familiarity of family traditions and the undercurrent of change began to shape my perception of belonging. The town, with its quiet streets and the hum of industry, seemed to breathe life into the moments that defined my childhood. It was a place where simplicity met imagination, where everyday routines held the backdrop for dreams and fears alike. The whispers of intuition often mingled with the echoes of the land’s history, nudging me toward a deeper understanding of both connection and transformation. It was this subtle interplay—between what was seen and felt, familiar yet fleeting—that prepared me for the transition to Clyde, a place where the contours of life expanded and landscapes shifted, offering entirely new canvases of experience to explore. 

Grandma Edith, my Mum's mum, was a homely person and I remembered her and her food. We used to go to her home for lunch and it was always three courses with soup, main, and pudding. I wasn't partial to all her cooking and would excuse myself from the table to visit the bathroom with a mouth full to spit out. One occasion my grandad showed the bush I sometimes would spit it out behind, hmm umm caught out. She also played the piano at church and had a great soulful singing voice. She was a very homely Grandma and she also knitted us all woollen socks.They were so colourful and all the cousins got a pair. They were great for wearing them in your gumboots.

Nana Isabella, my Dads mum as I remember, always had her hair done and dressed in tweed and tartan, I guess that's what they called it tailored. Visiting her was a different experience as we were to sit very quietly and she would be smoking away and sipping on something. Such opposites as grandparents. You were seen but not heard in her home and sometimes we would play outside or sit in the car.

I loved riding horses, they were always someone else's horses. I had many exciting moments of meeting the ground, or jumping off for my own safety. Never were my rides calm and peaceful, always chaotic and exciting, the adrenaline rush in the moment. It had been a passion of my Dads as he too had ridden in his younger days. He was always there to help or hinder. Always encouraging and taking me to shows.

  I remember at a noticeably early age hiding from aeroplanes in the corner of our garage in Nightcaps, afraid the plane may see me.  Dreaming of being in war times hiding from others and from bullets being fired towards me. Laying in hollows in a paddock so as not to be hit from the bullets, felt oh so real. I had a huge fear of knives and still do, I do not like blood or cutting my finger, my body feels the pain all the way through to my knees and the memory remains imprinted for many years. Past life memories that have not faded maybe? I also do not like seeing others bleeding. It sends a pain through my body. I can't explain why.

I remember running and jumping into bed as a child as if there was someone hiding under it, maybe someone was going to grab my foot and drag me away to where? That I had not contemplated . My brothers added to the fear coming into my room with sheets over their heads, just making sure my blood was running at speed through my heart.

Sneaking down the stairs to the funeral home, my Grandparents owned above their joinery business, to give ourselves a fright of what? I was not sure as my Grandparents said it's not the dead you worry about in this life. Oh such a true statement as I learned throughout my life.

Such carefree moments as a child and a great playground to start my life. Then we moved to Clyde for my Dads new employment on the Clyde dam. The local people took some adjusting to their landscape being changed, but when they saw the job security and money coming into the town most were more warming to the out of towners filling up their town. Change is not something people embrace at the beginning, but overtime they start to warm up to the idea it's going to happen regardless.

Clyde was an orchard growing district and with the dam being constructed many would lose their orchards to the lake. However they were reimbursed and able to move on. Now the area is full of wineries. It has a cycle track and tourists are investing in the area.

Clyde, this was a time when intuition and feeling of belonging to the land grew within me. Living up the valley where it would eventually be flooded, amongst orchards where fruit was fresh off the trees and plentiful. Sometimes you would see driving from the other side bright orange along the banks where they had dumped an over supply of over ripe apricots. It seemed like such a waste.

I was still riding other people's horses.I loved the days of riding the hills and allowing my mind to make up whatever it chose and dreaming away.

 My intuition and other senses were developing as I knew when my Nanna had passed, whilst on the school bus on our way home. I heard her say you will have to pack your bag when you get home and come south as I have passed.When we got home mum phoned to say to pack your bags, we need to go south as Nanna had passed, no surprise here as she had already told me. 

I remember waking up at boarding school knowing my cousin had shot himself as I saw  him standing in front of the sun glowing and shining bright, he was holding a gun and I immediately knew he had passed over. The image never made me feel concerned, it felt calm and like oh Ok. My mum phoned at lunch time to tell me and again I already knew.

In my last year of intermediate I had finally got my own pony as all my days were riding other people’s horses. Fernando was a beautiful Arabian pony full of energy.

Four days in and we had an accident that took me to hospital and wrecked a car and my  Fernando, never made it. I am thankful for the concussion as I do not remember the moment. Luckily only a fractured skull and a bit of skin off. I did not like riding where there was traffic though, I preferred the bush or remote tracks.

Years later when I had visited a reiki therapist. Which was a prompt daily as I dove passed his home, to phone up and book a session. So I finally booked in.    He touched my third eye (between and just above my eyes) . I got a vision of my accident and a voice saying, “you weren’t meant to live”. WHAT was my thought process, well I am very much alive. 

I did not over analyze that as to why I could not find any answer for that or resolution to it. Those moments became letting it go, that is way past my pay grade to get a handle on it. Maybe somewhere down the track I might find out. You can't go around trying to figure everything out, they put you in places for that, back then. Thankfully people are more open minded these days and have a wider world view on such things and topics.

I had a friend I used to ride with and rode her horses. We had some fun crazy rides as this seemed the norm and on one occasion found ourselves galloping into the Alexandra airport runway. Thankfully it was a tiny community airport and not any domestic flight one. The experience still gave us a rush of we shouldn't be here. We seemed to enjoy those moments of we shouldn't but we will.

 She was killed in a horse accident at Springston trophy where her horse slipped on ice and went down and crushed her. Jennifer Kroon was her name and I am not sure how long after my accident it was, when she died. She had travelled with my Dad to pick up a new horse for me after the accident. Pussy willow was a much more calm, quiet horse and at times although safe, boring. No adrenaline rush or moments of here we go this is gonna hurt with her. However, a beautiful horse.

The girl I was with on the day of my accident thought I was dead as she witnessed it all,  poor thing she saw me motionless on the road. 

When we have an experience there are others that are involved and to have their own experience through it. My riding companion, my parents, the lady in the car and those that came to help, those working for the emergency services, staff at the hospital all have their story of the event from their part in the story, never is it ours alone.

I lost school friends, Grandparents, friends and even though we grieve for them for not having them physically being in our lives anymore, there is a knowing that they are still beside us. Sometimes you may get a sense of them when a song appears on the radio to remind you of them or a smell that triggers a thought. That is them reminding you they are not far away.

 I guess having grandparents owning a funeral business gave us as family more of an insight to how we are handled in our last moments. As my grandmother said, if you see the process there is nothing to fear and you can't fill in the pieces you don't understand with imagination as there is nothing to imagine when you have physically seen it. Then you don't feel creeped out.

 I remember one experience when I glanced into my bedroom mirror to see not me but another young woman, from Nightcaps, the town I used to live in and the hurt and pain she was experiencing was consuming. As I focused in the mirror and felt like I was looking through her eyes and feeling her sadness and emotion, it was really odd.

Later to hear of her unfortunate experience of being dragged under the bridge and taken advantage of. Feeling the pain and sadness of others made my own experiences easy as others had worse experiences than my own.

 Feeling and sensing was normal to me as I thought everyone had these experiences only to find out that NOPE they don't. It never bothered me and I didn't give it much thought as it is part of me and who I am. We all have different abilities and these are mine.

My education at boarding school had ended and I started a career in Hairdressing and learning the art of driving.

Then we moved on to Christchurch as the Clyde dam was near completion and my Dads part of the work was done. My older brother was overseas and my other brother was living and working in Christchurch.

Trying to find my way in a city and making new friends was exciting. I got back to Hairdressing with the help of my parents, then went on to barbering for a change. Playing softball and touch rugby gave me a circle of connection.

 I moved to Sydney then to surfers paradise then back home to Christchurch, Hairdressing throughout that time and added some fine dining, restaurant work along the way to help a client out who needed staff. 

Working two jobs was fine as the income helped and it was like socializing every night and it did not cost a cent as my boss`s rule was if you make a wrong drink you had to drink it at the end of the night. I know right, of course I made wrong drinks of my liking like who even thought that was a good rule.Such a time of growth and learning.

Returning home I bought a house all at the age of 21 and my first marriage that created my beautiful daughter, before heading to Perth.

Through the years, I found myself reflecting deeply on how experiences shape us, not in isolation but through the shared connections they forge. Whether it was the fleeting moment of recognition in a stranger's touch, the silent assurance of loved ones who had passed, or the whispered echoes from distant memories—each left an indelible mark on my journey. Riding the waves of loss and renewal shaped my understanding of resilience, a thread that wove through the chapters of my life. Moving through different towns, occupations, and circles of friends became a way of rediscovering myself, each place offering a new perspective and a chance to embrace change. Even as I transitioned from riding horses to styling hair, from the solitude of the countryside to bustling cities, I carried with me a sense of wonder, a belief in the unseen guidance of those who touched my life. Life, with all its unpredictability, often felt like the subtle brushstroke of a master painter shaping a composition—sometimes bold, sometimes tender, but always vibrant with meaning. 

Perth was a time of spiritual growth and being protected along the way. My spiritual learning paved the way for me to get back on my path.

I was working for my oldest brother running his salon, which had been a real estate office previously and the chap had passed as he had had a heart attack . 

The building  was in a great location and very reasonable rent as people were too scared to rent knowing the chap had died. Perfect, not scared here.

 Interesting that I had been for a short time in my early life a real estate receptionist while trying to find a hairdressing apprenticeship. Now here I was combining both experiences.

While living in Perth, my father in-law was ill with leukaemia and I would send distant healing Reiki to him. My sister in-law at the time said in conversation he calls me by your name when I visit. I took that as confirmation he was aware of the reiki I was sending to him or thought it was me visiting. 

When he was about to pass over, I told my then husband who was going back to New Zealand to be with him. Your father will ask to go home, take him home as he wants to pass at home in his own surroundings. He phoned to say his father had passed, I asked did he ask to go home, he said yes. I asked did you take him home he said NO. 

Whilst living in Perth I started the journey to read more spiritual books and started meditation. I went to full moon gatherings and gatherings of the planets aligning. I had started the journey back to  myself. This all confirmed the things I didn't know but was seeing, hearing and feeling as normal and part of me and my growth.

 I had an older client in Perth ,who when I was washing her hair .I smelt  perfume and heard bells. When I nervously told her she said that is a sign from my husband and she had asked him for that sign when she should publish his book. I found it nice that he chose to allow me to inform her it was time. 

I later found out in my meditation class that the people taking the class, Jim & Jackie Lindsay, were friends of his. Perth did a lot of those moments for me. 

One day my clippers broke. It was close to Christmas and I thought how am I going to work without them, as the companies had closed for Christmas. 

At that moment, an electrician who was a client popped his head in the door and said, “did you need something”, I was like umm yes, I need my clippers fixed. He took them away and bought them back the same day. I was not inconvenienced by not having them at a busy time of the year. I was thankful people like him, were tuned in and listening to those prompts because had he not I would have been in a real pickle.

I embraced the journey of learning massage and aromatherapy and how to make my own shampoos and products for the salon as it was nice to lessen the amount of chemicals I was using and it felt good to be offering a choice to people. 

It even took me on a journey of working with people having hair transplants from using their own hair to fill in the gaps or areas missing hair. I had made a lotion which seemed to help with the securing of the follicles being transplanted and less loss of the newly transplanted pieces.

 I learnt reflexology from an incredibly special woman, who became a dear friend. She was Karen, she even moved to New Zealand after meeting her last partner in this life. Not that she knew that then and we had great times and learning together. I had said to her I don't think I will work with feet being the reflexology. I think you should never say never as more times than not it happens, I have since learnt.

While still in Perth, I gave my time on a Wednesday morning to a residential unit for people with complex special needs and gave them reflexology in their sensory unit. Colour once again in my life. Yes, reflexology is the one thing I wasn't going to embrace.

 I had an amazing experience with a woman who was non-verbal, she used to moan and throw her hands around uncontrollably whilst securely restrained in her chair. While doing reflexology on her good foot and her other foot that was deformed and little, I all of a sudden noticed she was still and not moving. I looked up and she put her hand on my shoulder and I looked in the corner of the room to see a soldier there in an Australian uniform. I thought ,or he told me mentally he was her grandfather and thanked me for taking the time with his granddaughter. I got a fright internally thinking really is this really happening. Then the door opened and the person said oh sorry, you're in here. They were showing someone around the facility. The man disappeared and the client went back to her busy self. 

 I offered my service in that residential unit ,management selected 4 people who I offered reflexology to, in their sensory unit. It was a beautiful room with colour changing and floating through it.

Word of mouth spread and I ended up with a chap who had never been out of a facility come to my home for reflexology. It was challenging for him as he navigated going in a car and then being in a private home. We had fun though.

On one of his weekly visits I was standing outside waiting for them to arrive and then the car flew up the drive and the support person jumped out yelling can you hear sirens. I was like no and wondering what all this was about, he had gone through a police check point and as the client in the back seat had managed to remove his clothing on the drive to my place, he wasn't stopping to explain to police why the person in the back was naked and carried on through the check point. When he calmed down and thought the process through we were in tears of laughter. I suggested dungarees for his client might be a preferred traveling attire.  

It felt so nice to give the client that opportunity and experience in life when he was a prisoner within himself unable to verbally communicate and function as most take for granted the gift of walking and talking. He always relaxed and seemed to enjoy his reflexology sessions. The power of touch, I guess where some never receive it.

I gave my time helping out with the people in community homes with classes of soap making and coming into the salon at night to have the full experience in the salon and to know that they can ask for anything they want when they have their hair done. Having their hair washed and spoken to through the whole process so they weren't afraid of the experience and learnt to enjoy the experience. 

New experiences can be overwhelming and if hairdressers haven't stopped to explain to people what the process is and just expect everyone is going to sit there in an orderly fashion. Especially when you approach a client as a hairdresser with a pair of scissors, that mum said at home ,dont touch because they are dangerous and sharp it will hurt, of course you're going to panic. The small moments are big for some people.

Having trust in that, that comes to me. While I was living in Australia, I was prompted whilst sitting quietly in the warmth of the evening outside in contemplation to get my pen and paper and so I followed this guidance from where it came. I did not seek to find out, just trust. I sketched out  a calendar and each day represented colour for that day. Each date was bought back to a single digit and there were a set of 9 and each 9 had a colour to match. I wrote it out and trusted that one day it would make sense, so popped it away for the time being. 

Perth Australia was the opening up of my spiritual/knowing/trusting in other possibilities. I met people who were spiritually aware and it felt like I had my tribe of people who knew the same as me and it was natural. No one thought you odd or different.

As Perth unfolded its revelations, I found myself delving deeper into the intricacies of existence, uncovering fragments of wisdom that felt as though they had been waiting patiently for me to notice them. Each interaction, each moment of connection carried echoes of something greater—whether it was in the gentle truth shared by a client, the quiet sense of belonging under the moonlit sky, or the subtle alignment of paths that seemed too perfect to be coincidence. The city became more than a place; it was a mirror, reflecting the growth and transformation I had undergone, urging me to embrace the fullness of my journey with gratitude and curiosity, even when the road was uneven and uncharted. 

My daughter too is gifted with seeing and knowing as she told me when I asked “where are your friends ‘?" as we had not been having the usual run in with them and she was blaming them for her actions. She replied “Back in New Zealand waiting for us”. Four weeks later her and I were back in New Zealand, leaving her father behind to remain there. 

Just like that out of the blue and in a blink of an eye we were back in New Zealand  and out of my comfort zone I went. The universe had a different idea for my journey in this life. 

Listen to the little people as they have much to tell us as they have not been conditioned by those in society that do not believe. 

Over time, I came to realise that life often presents moments that transcend normal understanding, inviting us to reflect and connect with something larger. Whether through the quiet presence of spirits, the profound impact of helping others navigate unspoken challenges, or the serendipity of meaningful encounters, these moments seemed woven into the fabric of my journey. It was as if the universe, in its mysterious way, guided me to trust its subtler cues, urging me to embrace each experience with openness and curiosity. This thread of trusting the unseen and listening to the quiet prompts continued to shape my path, even as life shifted unexpectedly, leading me toward home and deeper connections with my family. 

It was time to be home and support my family.

Before my dad's passing, I had been house sitting  and dog sitting for a friend.  During the night the little young dog woke me up barking. As the older dog was not stirring, I was not too phased but to appease the young one I sat up in bed to see a man walk down the hallway dressed in a hat and an oil skin  coat. I went back to sleep as I knew this was spirit and thought he belonged to the homeowners. Nothing to do with me?? I spoke of it to my friend whose house it was and she said “no” he doesn't belong to us. I didn't give it much thought apart from Oh she doesn't know, it must be hers.

 Later while nursing my dad with emphysema and lung cancer, I spotted this man standing at the corner of my parents’ home. I asked mentally why are you here? He replied I am your father’s keeper and will be taking him soon. Twenty-four hours later he had taken my father`s spirit. Amazing how things get presented at the right time to give an explanation to events on our path. 

The night he passed he had said “Och aye, the noo, Jimmy ( a Scottish phrase) . Which I have since found out means, “Oh yes just now and Jimmy is an informal term to address a male stranger.and who’s knocking, I was like at your door, not mine. This stranger may have been the man standing at my Mum and dads corner of the house.I had only looked up the meaning now in 2025, wow. It is these moments that are a lightbulb moment as I had not even thought to look at its meaning, why I am not sure but there it is and it gives me a bigger understanding of what I had seen.

 When my daughter woke up after the funeral directors had been to collect him. I explained to her the man had taken him; she was not impressed with my explanation as she thought someone had stolen him as she was only six years old at the time. Yes, I could have explained that much better.

 We travelled south to our family town where he was to be cremated then buried and we gathered at my grandparents’ home.Their home seemed to be where we all gathered although they had passed. My uncle remained in the family home. It was a big old villa house with high ceilings and had an air about it. She would not stay at the house as she had decided, there were too many ghosts there. So she stayed with my Auntie in a neighbouring town, so she got right out of there.

 Later when we had gathered at my Grandparents home to celebrate the passing of my dad, we were sitting in the kitchen, and I caught my dad’s reflection on the pot of soup on the stove.

 I asked him what he was doing as I felt a panic. He said do I go through the door or curtain; I was like hey I’m not dead I do not know. Later, a dear friend ( the same friend who I had met in Perth)had given me a book that was the parables of Kryon, and it had mentioned walking through the curtain. I wonder which one he chose?

When we were at the cemetery placing his ashes into the family grave, I walked off to the car as it had been a long journey from his passing to taking him south to waiting to bury his ashes. I was driving and someone jumped in the backseat of the car, I said yes, it's been a long journey aloud. I looked in the back and I was alone. Dad thought the same he was ready to move on.  A funny thing when we were gathered for the cup of tea and sandwich part to celebrate those passing before the pub part. The town hall fire siren went off, nobody rushed away and all said that it would be Whiskey, my dads nickname. He was always up to something.

I remember when my Dad had passed and I was in a tiled white tunnel and it was almost see through and he was just there on the other side. Maybe he lives right beside us and we are just unable to see that frequency. Mind boggling at times the unknown could be anything and everything.

Through these experiences, I found myself drawn deeper into the mystique of life’s interconnected threads, where the tangible and intangible often collided with uncanny precision. From the vibrant hues of reiki healing to the lessons in energy fields, the world around me seemed to whisper secrets that only intuition could decipher. Each moment felt like a puzzle piece, linking the spiritual encounters with my father to the inexplicable energy disruptions that seemed to follow me. The realm of the unknown beckoned with its pull, teaching me to flow with life's currents rather than resist, and reminding me that every step forward was an exploration, a dance with the universe's rhythm. And so, I embraced the lessons, trusting that even in the chaos, there was meaning to be uncovered and a light guiding me through the labyrinth of existence. 

New beginnings, new husband, new home. Striving to move forward bringing colour to the front. Yet not quite getting it into my life path permanently. Just dipping my toes in but listening. Trusting.

As life unfolded in its unpredictable ways, I found myself increasingly attuned to the unseen forces that seemed to weave their presence into my experiences. Each encounter, whether through meditation, reiki, or happenstance, carried a certain resonance—an unspoken message urging me to explore deeper truths about intuition and energy. The connection between the physical and metaphysical felt palpable, as if the very air buzzed with clues waiting to be deciphered. My journey often intertwined with moments of uncanny precision, where coincidence seemed too deliberate to dismiss. It was in this realm of wonder and contemplation that I continued to tread, trusting not only my hands but also the inexplicable gifts that shaped the narrative of my days. 

 Meditation groups, reiki healing, colour therapy.

Reconnecting with my teacher Karan from Perth. New teachers crossing my path. Seeing the connections of those to be met. 

Following my intuition to visit Peter the reiki healer and being given the gift of seeing in a parallel time of my horse accident in Clyde where the voice said I was not meant to survive and my response was yes I was.

Attuned with my spiritual self. Reflection and an open mind can bring answers to those moments and a greater understanding in this journey of life.

Christchurch was the time of learning and exploring.Christchurch, the passing of my Dad so close to me. Learning to trust with having scarcity in my life after such a big lesson from Perth as I was  blind sided from those who I thought I trusted and thought I loved. I raised above it with grace and trust. Knowing when you fall there is always light at the end of the tunnel. I don't think we learn from the easy, well maybe actually that is just me.

Throughout my days in hairdressing I always felt the energy of those I came across and as soon as you touched their head a knowing would appear. Clients would say how good I was with their children, who normally would be difficult, as they seemed fine with the experience with me.  I had not experienced them any other way than making it exciting and fun, even if it was sitting on the floor playing with the toys or washing my combs in the sink with water all over the place and they were oblivious to having their haircut. Distraction was key to the success of their haircut.

 A Russian woman grabbed my hands once and said I had golden hands, so it was those conformations that reminded me of the privilege it was to have  people trust me with their pride and joy,  their hair. If your hair isn't right you don't feel right. It sets you up for the day to go out in the world with confidence or not.

I have never been good with names and often would say the wrong name to a client only to find it was someone they knew or were related to, on one occasion the name of a man my older client was having an affair with. Those moments led to clients thinking I knew more than what I did and it got a bit uncomfortable at times. 

I had one woman once, while I was out at a ceremony. I looked at this woman standing beside me with her eyes full of tears. I thought Oh nooo. I said have I spoken to you ?She said yes,  I had been speaking about her son, who was in prison for an armed robbery of a dairy, and what had been happening to her.

 I was annoyed as it was a celebration and I was having a drink and obviously the spirit had decided it was a perfect time to pass on a message. From that time on I always said when I am out enjoying myself and consuming alcohol no one is to come through. 

Thankfully they listened as this woman thought I was a medium of sorts and wanted a future reading from me, I had to assure her I was not and knew nothing. I run my own life, I wasn't having someone else do it. Well that's what I thought at the time, but really are we really in control or is something else happening on our journey? Opens up a can of worms to contemplate and how far down the rabbit hole does one want to explore. 

I was recommended a quantum physics movie to watch called, what the ‘BLEEP’ that will open up your thought process for sure. That direction is a whole other topic but one I explore on the daily.

One of my frustrating and expensive gifts is blowing fuses, lightbulbs, blowing hairdryers up, straighteners all the electrical. I would and still do go past road lights and they go out. Frustrates my husband at home with lightbulbs that they recon last for ages, nope not at ours. 

I got out of a lease to a salon in Riccarton I owned because of the electrical issues and it went as far as blowing a fuse in the mall's main electricity boxes. I had an electrician on speed dial for the amount of times a week I needed him. The Mall management was not impressed and decided a salon was drawing too much power for the size of the power installed and the cost too huge to remedy. That was an extreme for the universe to move me on on my path.

These experiences led me to delve even deeper into the realms of energy and intuition, allowing the threads of curiosity and discovery to guide my path. Engaging with reiki and light therapy not only brought profound insights but also connected me with others who shared similar vibrations, each encounter seeming divinely orchestrated. I began to understand the intricate patterns that emerged when spirit intertwined with intention, noticing how the synchronicity of numbers, colours, and energy shaped the flow of my life. The moments of inspiration, as if whispered by unseen guides, often compelled me toward experiments and projects that resonated with my sense of purpose. It was amidst this exploration that I learned to balance the practical with the metaphysical, trusting the harmony of the universe even as it challenged me with unpredictability. In every choice, whether guided by instinct or serendipity, the journey unraveled its layers, bringing me closer to the essence of healing, connection, and understanding. 

 Mind you, when I was young and walking to school, we would go past an old rundown home with grass up to the windowsills and a horse keeping the grass down. It had an electric wire around it to keep the horse in. 

Yes, correct you know me by now, every morning I had to check that fence. Yes every morning that fence was on. I won't analyze that in my personality.

 On one other occasion while on  school holidays, I was working on a neighbours orchard, I went out to get some more packing boxes and thought I would sneak a wee rest. I climbed to the top of the stack in this room and lay down looking up at the ceiling which was at arms length. 

Then this is when I got intrigued with a light socket with no bulb. I thought to myself with legs crossed in the air and big toe wiggling, I wonder because I do always wonder. Before allowing the wonder to fade I popped my big toe in, YEP exactly, then the panic of it getting stuck with the electricity running through me and knowing I was being naughty lying around, quickly pulled it out before it started to swell and get stuck in there. I took off back to the packing shed and pretended nothing was wrong and I wasn't up to no good. I was so freaked out, me and electricity hmmm. 

On returning home to Christchurch I was starting to think more about colour and Reiki and healing with light therapy. I created my own coloured light and started doing reiki and light therapy.

I then got this thought, vision, however you want to put it, of using a coloured light to heal.I went about with the help of a friend and got a chap to build me a coloured disc rotating around the front of a spot light so as all the colours would travel across a person's body. I then thought “OH” I should do a reiki treatment whilst the light is on and use my calendar to synchronise the healing. 

Then I thought of nine sessions, nine people and set about to offer this healing to those that chose with no exchange of money as this was to be my project to see how they came together. Of course the moments I thought, are actually someone else giving you those thoughts. When you think of something that you truly know can't be your thoughts alone, I believe it is from your guides.

It was perfect that I owned my own salon as this gave me a supply of clients to test my theory on. This was shown to me, as a thought that played out in my mind as it really was not my idea that I am sure of. Of course, it was brilliant.  Interesting to note as I read this now and realize in 2024. I have created a 9 session program on change for people and here I was doing a 9 session reiki program. There is synchronicity right there. The power of 9 and I feel this is the vibration I am to be working with in this lifetime. 

 I was told to offer 9 sessions to 9 people free of charge. I did this and the reward was mine as I felt that shifted my energy and opened me up even more. Seeing the changes in those that participated was beautiful and to be able to give them information about their loved ones and selves that only they knew was confirmation. It truly works if you open yourself up to energy healing.

I had met a man named Donald Hamilton who was a colour therapist. 

My sister in law at the time introduced me to him as my nephew was having treatment from him.I mentioned my system I had created. I had a discussion with Donald on what I had received and he totally understood it and said I don't know where that has come from. You need to patent it. I thought it was hard enough for me to understand the whole concept and good luck to those who want to do that, take my work.

 As I believe in karma and it's like baking a cake, you might have the same recipe but 5 people will get 5 different results and it may not even work out for some.  Donald Hamilton, used coloured thread and frequency to heal people. He used his pendulum to guide him on the colours required for each client. He gave me one of his wooden, black pendulums to enable me to learn the gift of dowsing. His clients came and sat in comfortable chairs and were connected to a large machine in the middle of the room and were connected with their colour required at that moment for them. 

One day when having treatment from him,I sat connected and off to sleep I would go; at that time, I was a talker not a snorer as I am now. 

When I  woke up, eyes were in my direction and the facial expressions told the story. I called it free entertainment for them, I did not particularly want to investigate what words I had spoken during my sleep time.  I wonder if it became a busier time with his clients as there was not much to do whilst sitting there having a treatment connected to the machine in the middle of the room. I am not sure how many at a time fitted around it? Maybe 10 or so?A bit of entertainment for them all at my expense, that did not bother me.

Embracing these moments of deeper connection and unseen guidance has shaped my understanding of life’s intricate tapestry, where dreams, intuition, and relationships weave together to reveal profound truths. Each encounter, whether with Katrina or others who have crossed my path, seems to hold a fragment of wisdom or resonance, nudging me toward clarity and purpose. As I have navigated life's chapters—from the healing work with colour and wax to transformative conversations and uncanny synchronicities—I’ve come to see these experiences not as isolated events but as threads in a larger design that connects the physical and spiritual realms. This sense of connection, sometimes fleeting yet undeniably present, underscores the importance of trusting the journey and cherishing what is revealed along the way, even when the path takes unexpected turns.

Then I met a lady named Katrina Leslie, she became a client of mine while I was hairdressing , who then became a close friend before passing. Her dad was a colour therapist in the north island, Noel Leslie. She had not mentioned that for a long time, knowing I was working with colour. Maybe the time she felt wasn't right.

His form of treatment was using again coloured thread and a copper coil device with the client’s photo, to do distant healing daily for the client, changing the thread on the sequence daily. 

So, after a visit up north, he showed me how to work with them and said I feel you will do it differently.He gave me a pendulum wooden and black to work with the same as Donald Hamilton, only difference was size. 

I packed the copper coil machines into my carry-on luggage and carried them through  security at the airport . I thought hmmm what if they ask what they are?  White light ,it went smooth. I came home with some coils and off I went doing my own clients and healing.

Whilst I was visiting with Katrina in Auckland , she and I visited a dear friend of hers. During our conversations, she had made comments about her granddaughter going into surgery and after her surgery becoming a smoker. She was not a smoker before her surgery. I was fascinated by the ability of those who had passed being able to hook into a living being's energy and made sure I protected myself even more.

Such reflections on life's interconnectedness have often led me to marvel at the intricate synchronicities and the unseen threads binding our personal journeys with others'. Whether through the whispers of intuition, the lessons shared by friends who have since departed, or the fleeting déjà vu moments that seem to echo from parallel realms, each instance serves as a reminder of the profound depth in life's tapestry. The guidance and lessons, often cloaked in mystery, challenge us to delve deeper, to embrace the unknown and to seek clarity not in absolutes but in the grace of unfolding moments. These experiences, woven into the fabric of existence, urge us to be attuned to the present, to decipher the subtle messages embedded in our dreams, encounters, and crossroads where the spiritual and physical converge. 

On returning home ,this took me on a path of colour therapy . 

I worked with coloured thread and copper coils and sent distant healing to the photos of those who engaged in the healing. I then changed it from cotton as that was relying on being able to source the thread and things were getting fickle at that time. So I went for wax as you can always get wax well it seems that way.Then I changed to making wax disks and doing the healing with the client’s photos and the discs. Still utilizing the calendar as well. I had also written a handbook including the colour calendar and aromatherapy and Bach essences. Together they complete a healing system of 9. 

When I was told from above or guided by a guide to use wax and to use a tea light burner to melt the wax. I didn't question it as I just thought no electricity they must know me well.

 I approached a potter in our street to make me a burner that had little cups on top to melt the wax in. Interestingly there was to be no electricity used in this process. He bought it for me at the end of August 2011 and they looked to me like leather bands with bolts in them, like back in the day of people being chained in slavery. Interesting because it was like I knew it from a memory? 

Yet he had no idea. September the 4th we had a big earthquake in Christchurch and lost power, however I could carry on as I was using tealight candles and wax. 

Perfect thank you universe for the heads up even if at the time I had no understanding of what was to come. Trusting in those moments ,of when you have a thought and know it has not come from your logical thinking. Those are the guided moments that offer many gifts if we, but listen and follow through. You don't need to know the outcome, just trust the ride.

I remembered having a dream of being a student back in Egypt maybe? It looked and felt like it.  The person I was under did not like that I was creating it my way and getting recognition. He had me banished and taken away with my hands and feet strapped and chained. I don't like things around my wrists, clothing bracelets etc or around my ankles. I am claustrophobic as well. 

Maybe from these past lives. I believe Noel Leslie was the man in my past and we have cleared that Karma in this lifetime working with colour and him happy I have approached it from my energy in this life. One never really knows, however interesting to ponder. Exploring those moments of wondering what those thoughts are and where do they come from.

I remember waking up during the night unable to breathe and heading down my stairs where suddenly there was this gold presence beside me, and I said I cannot do this without you, get back in here and it passed back into me. I have never analysed it as that seems beyond my ability. Interesting if we journey through life and play it like a game of tag, you are in I am out?? Mind you, I think had that gold light stayed out of me, there would no longer be me.

 I feel that aligns with many situations in life.

 Katrina came into the salon one day and said “you don't look like a hairdresser, you look like someone standing in front of people talking. That came true when I taught at a hairdressing college. Then later when we had moved to the West Coast after having four years hairdressing, I facilitated domestic violence programmes to women affected by violence.

When my friend Katrina had passed, I had not long gone with a friend to Ashburton for a reading. The chap that was meant to do the reading  was sick and he had booked us in with an older woman at her home. No coincidence there as she was good and had bought Katrina through. She said she was looking after children and  had a partner,the two things she had not experienced fully in this life. 

She always said she would not come back to experience earth again but I am sure she joked when she said she might come back. Since her passing I get the nudge when she is around supporting me from the other side, wherever that may be.

 Then life and a change of towns and lack of space evolved, so colour therapy was once again put on the shelf for a time. 

One other occasion I was speaking of my dear friend ,to a passenger in the car whilst driving from Invercargill back to the West Coast, of my feelings of her passing and how I thought that maybe, when my phone rang and I said I wont answer that as it might be her and I was driving. We stopped further up the road at a cafe so as the passenger could grab something to eat and I took that moment to Check my phone and I had missed a call from my friend's husband, I phoned him back to find she had passed in her sleep that morning.

 The passenger in the car was surprised to say the least. She heard the conversation when she jumped back into the car and the look on her face was priceless.This was my friend Karen, who I had met in Perth and moved to New Zealand around the same time as I had ended my marriage and came home from Perth. That too is a longer story with its lessons. Even in moments of uncertainty, when life seemed to take unexpected turns, I found solace in the quiet rhythm of creativity and the humble joy of crafting. The carved feathers, the wax discs infused with energy, and the simple act of giving became my way of connecting to something greater—an unseen current guiding me toward a purpose I could not yet fully grasp. As I reflected on the twists and turns, the ebb and flow of existence, I began to embrace the idea that life is not a straight path but a mosaic, where each piece finds its place in time. There is a beauty in surrendering to the unknown, trusting that every effort, every act of kindness, and every step forward contributes to a larger tapestry of meaning. It is from this space of acceptance that I move toward new beginnings, carrying the lessons of the past with gratitude and the hope that seeds planted now will bloom in their own season. 

 Karan was an aromatherapist, Herbalist, Bowen therapist, a walking encyclopedia of the human body, spirituality tuned. Beautiful amazing woman.

The passing of friends and family, those we love should be celebrated as they have completed their lessons and journey in life. It is those left behind that grieve, because of what we did or did not say and the things we wished we had done. Selfish on our behalf not of the one who has passed. We may or may not be able to see them, but I am sure they can see us. 

Realising that those dream moments are connected to your path at this present time and they are usually not the first thought you have of the dream when waking but a message within. A bigger picture.

I believe in the deja vu moments, that they are memories of an experience we have had once before, or are they parallel lives that we have. I am slowly working those out. If we are living in the past, present,future simultaneously  then maybe those experiences being had are the residue of memories experienced in moments. Such a rabbit hole of thought. Always something to ponder in our life and the path we are on when we question the WHY in it.

 There is always a bigger picture that is not always obvious as we would probably hide away if we saw what was before us. Better to deal with it the best we know how when it presents itself at that exact moment.

 Over time I heard others talk of situations where they felt another spirit who had not passed who had hung around people who drank as they had in their life, they had addictions or were smokers or depressed people. I guess they call them earth bound, something I haven't thought of too much.

 There is so much to know in this life and I only concentrate on what I experience and know,not  so much of others lives as that is their life and lessons not mine. It would be such a rabbit hole if I tried to understand everything. I do know from experience that if you need to know ,the answers will present themselves when the time is right and you can go, oh yeah that's what that meant after the fact as reflection is a great tool.

 Who knows, but it sure is interesting to contemplate if like me you are intrigued by those concepts. Slowing down and trusting those moments of knowing and resting in the peace that all will be well when you have figured out the lesson or reason for that moment. I feel the lessons keep coming so being aware of what they are for you is important so you don't need to create a cycle of the same lesson being repeated over and over again just in different clothes. Sometimes we need to see it twice to reflect and understand that, that is the lesson. Ok so I usually need it twice and we could return to the electricity moment to truly get a picture of me and my lessons.

Now for the next set of lessons and moving forward will be different as each encounter and experience adds to the wealth of knowledge intended for the time right now. 

I have had two dear friends transition to their purposeful place in the other realm. Whatever that be for them. I have had messages and glimpses of them when they come to guide me and offer support. 

At the gathering Katrina created after her passing there were family and selected friends of Katrina's. When I looked around the room these people represented a piece of Katrina that made her whole. Each one of us had an aspect of her. On returning home, I got mail from her even though she had passed in the parcel was a letter saying don't cry for me and two beautiful crystals. That woman was so organised in this life and when she passed. Mail from heaven is so special.

 One of her dear friends was born on the same day as me and I never knew that until we had connected on facebook to discover we shared the same birthday. (Funny).

I have one dear friend that has travelled with me for many years still left on this earth and she keeps it real for me and I can bounce off where I feel I am at to her with comfort and ease and no judgement, although Bronni lives in Australia. I have managed a couple of trips over and have constant phone contact , she is never far and the friendship has been the same all the way through from the beginning. She told me when I was pregnant and I didn't even know, sure enough when I went for the pregnancy test and the lady phoned back from the chemist ,(as you could back then drop off a sample), to say it was positive. I had to ring back and check again as I wasn't really comprehending the word positive.

My wedding photo  of us, Karen,Katrina, Bronni and I, in 2003 reminds me of them all here celebrating mine and Ross's commitment to one another and now it is just her and I out of the four of us left.

Charleston

 Then life and a change of towns and lack of space evolved, so colour therapy once again was put on the shelf for a time. I know right for someone intuitive it wasn't sinking in. It was always there, the time just didn't feel right and I didn't have all the puzzles together.

Moving to Charleston, a small community on the west coast of the South Island was fast tracked once the decision was made. My husband and I sold our home to our niece who had lived in the street herself growing up. I had a job hairdressing to go to all in a month. 

We had purchased a caravan and bought a piece of land to build a home on later, as there were no homes to buy because the coal mining was at its peak. 

 On my drive through the Buller Gorge, I got a “welcome home” from a voice. 

I have not lived here before, or have I? 

Even as the landscape and rhythms of daily life shifted around me, I sensed that each new chapter offered a subtle invitation to trust the unfolding journey. The moments of doubt, the unexpected detours, and the quiet joys all wove together, reminding me that growth often comes in the spaces between what we plan and what actually arises. Looking back on friendships that have guided me, lessons I’ve gathered—sometimes twice over—and the gentle nudges from loved ones no longer here in the physical, I find reassurance in the synchronicities that appear just when I need them most. With each choice, each move, I am learning to honour the whispers of intuition and the comfort of familiar souls, whether near or far, in this realm or another. It’s a tapestry of connection and discovery, where the unknown is not to be feared, but embraced as part of the greater story unfolding around and within me. 

Settling in was easy and welcoming. Tai and Dave, my employers, who now feel like family, were particularly good to us. Carmel, Tai's cousin worked with us and brought so much humour to our daily life.Never a dull moment and oh so many belly laugh moments and pranks. It was fun getting up each day to see what would unfold and many a deserving glass of bubbles at the end of each day with the odd game thrown in.During whitebait season, Dave would cook us up some for lunch and the Christmas work parties were always entertaining.

Everyone knows one another in this small town. 

The time at the supermarket takes longer as people get to know you, fun at first then comes the timing of when there won’t be many there, is the way you get through quicker. Funny how it changes from a new fun experience to avoidance, so as your trolley isn’t being judged by your purchases.  

After attempting to build a big barn style home . However, spirit had another plan as the council made the application process difficult. I decided there must be an easy, cost effective way and my prayers were answered with a client in the salon who had  a tiny home built in two weeks on her property. 

This was the path I would take and got Craig the builder's  phone number and off we went. Initially he said he wasn't going to build anymore this year, and my heart sank. He then received the visa bill, he said  his wife had a wee shopping spree on the visa so he was happy to. Thank-you to his wife , “yay”.

 After the initial visit with his wife for us to choose the colours and lay-out, he arrived in his housebus and boom, we had a tiny home built in two weeks. My husband had said “oh you won’t be out of the caravan by Christmas” um yes, I will and so it was. In our tiny home , by the twelfth of December thank you universe. 

Tiny homes years later are becoming more attractive to people to live in. They give freedom of time as you are not consumed doing housework in your spare time and are able to put that time into hobbies, outings and time to yourself. I would rather use the extra square footage to put in vege gardens and entertaining spaces outside for people to enjoy. 

The government is bringing in a new law to allow people to build granny flats so that people have somewhere for family members to reside without requiring a permit. Perfect, ahead of our time, that is awesome news.

 After four years working on the Coast, in my chosen career as a hairdresser, my body said it's time to find something else less demanding on the body. As my dear friend that has since passed, had once said to me. I see you standing in front of people teaching.That is what I did for the next five years, educating those affected by domestic violence. It was a privilege to sit in their space and hear their stories and encourage them to make positive change. 

Charleston became lessons similar to that of the past.  Connecting to family in a different way, my spiritual family. 

Those times were very rewarding and being of service to those in need at a time where their journey was in a bumpy stage of their life and feeling they had lost their direction.

  Then came a moment for me, when I had been blind sided once again. This time in my career not my personal life. This truly was left field and I am thankful I had a firm toolset to understand what had transpired and moved on with strength and compassion within me. I was not about to give satisfaction to others by reacting to something that did not belong to me. As they say, not my monkey, not my circus. Sometimes you just walk away and trust the process when others are playing their own game. Not all experiences are for you to join in on.

 I had once before had to use this inner strength to move forward in life and not be consumed by the actions of others who were creating their own Karma in this lifetime. I will leave that for a higher source to deal with, not mine to engage in.  Some lessons in life are for us and some for others to learn from.

Amidst all the shifting landscapes and evolving roles, I found myself continually guided by a quiet sense of purpose—sometimes a gentle nudge, sometimes a forceful push from the universe, each shaping the next stage of my unfolding story. There were days of lightness, where laughter bubbled up alongside gratitude for simple pleasures, and evenings when uncertainty crept in, asking me to trust that even setbacks are teachers in disguise. Through each shift, I listened more closely to the wisdom of my own heart, learning to release expectations and embrace the unknown with curiosity and humility. It was in these liminal spaces, between endings and beginnings, that I grew most—discovering resilience not just in overcoming, but in surrendering to the flow, letting go of what was and opening to what might be. This ongoing dance of letting go and inviting in has taught me to see each encounter, each change of direction, as another brushstroke in a work of art still in progress, shimmering with possibility. 

Now back to colour I have gone. Vicky-Life Coach & Colour has a great ring to it.

New beginnings with my new car. I purchased her on 12/12/2024 a yellow day, this is a pearl white car. I felt my yellow trusty Rocket had given me the blessing of pearl white. It's noticing the little things that bring me joy. The next day was a friday so I said to the car sales person it will all happen today as tomorrow is friday the 13th. The car salesman was Japanese and understood  numerology and the thought process I was in. Although I was born on the 13th and very much alive, I said to him it won't be tomorrow, he commented he had noticed my date of birth on my drivers license. Such a nice man.

 When I announced to two friends I was buying a new car to journey with they both voiced what bright colour this time? I said no not this time, this time is white as in white light I will be protected on my journeys. 

I also felt it was time not to stand out and be seen as I had been guided in my work to go about my purpose under the radar as everyone doesn't need to know what you do and I felt my new car was a symbol of just that.

I would like to call her the gift as she is, because I have not paid any money towards her. My mother offered to buy me a car and as her funds were in term deposit, my brother paid and will sort the payment out with mum later. So thankful for their generosity at a time where my funds were /are low. The ebb and flow that life gives us sometimes or we find ourselves in. I like to think I will have that opportunity to support others financially. I guess at times I have. I find it easier to give than receive to be honest and yet I guess that is something we need to learn both for balance in this life. Part of what goes around comes around.

I have been carving feathers into wood chimes and making garden hanging decorations. I give them away to people. This time has taught me patience in a time of transition within myself and life path.

 I have started making wax discs again with the essential oil energy they carry. For what purpose I am not sure, just prompted to start making them and like any good student I will follow the guidance and trust the reason will show itself when it is needed.

 I have applied for jobs and have not been successful and feel that that experience and work I did lives in the past now. Those lessons learnt; those connections happened for the purpose intended. 

I am grateful for the support and guidance that has led me to this point, and I am excited about the possibilities that lie ahead. My vision is to create a sanctuary of healing and transformation, where individuals can find peace, clarity, and inspiration. I know that with patience, perseverance, and a positive mindset, this vision will manifest in beautiful ways. 

Looking back to where I was and where I am is a great reflection as my writing follows, explaining that.

As I move forward, I remain open to new ideas, new connections, and new opportunities. I trust that everything is unfolding exactly as it should, and I am ready to embrace the future with optimism and enthusiasm. 

Each night, as the world quieted and the day's patterns faded into a hush, I found myself more attuned to the gentle invitations of change—nudges that whispered of unfinished stories and new horizons. Sometimes these invitations arrived as sudden insight, other times as the slow unfolding of quiet certainty, revealing that the act of simply paying attention was itself a form of progress. The years had woven together a tapestry of unexpected lessons and small moments of wonder, teaching me that navigating uncertainty was less about control and more about trust—a willingness to accept the mysterious choreography of endings and beginnings. As I eased into this season of possibility, it became clear that transformation is not a destination, but a process of continually opening, reshaping, and becoming, guided by intuition and deep gratitude for the people and places that have colored my journey so far. 

Being woken during the night to a feeling of thud back into my physical body and a feeling  it was normal and just a rough re-entry. Wondering where I had been and what my experience was. It comes with whether we are awake or asleep, as I know we are not just on this earth. There is much more we can not see, is my belief.

Now for the next set of lessons and moving forward will be different as each encounter and experience adds to the wealth of knowledge intended for the time right now. 

 Even though two of my friends and teachers in this life have passed into the spirit realm, it feels like they are all right here guiding me along. My days are disappearing, “Poof” just like that the hours have gone, maybe as I am a very- terribly slow at typing and I have tuned into my computer’s energy of slow. I do not think I will recognize the speed when I have a new one. I will enjoy the pace for now as so much is learnt each day by just being. 

I am looking forward to this new piece of my life.  

 Two major forced changes thus far in my life due to not listening and following the guidance. The emotional upheaval and physical changes have given me a deeper lesson to this life and brought with it a happier experience once outside of the initial storm. The transition could have been smoother. Reminder to self, it could have been easier had I listened, guess that’s one of those life lessons in trusting your instinct? Books come at the perfect time to give guidance and understanding to where and what I am doing. 

Well, here I go again, house sitting and dog sitting. Let's see where this weekend takes me. I am going to sit and work with my guide Kimra and see where this takes me. 

Well, had the hand towel stolen whilst in the bathroom from said resident dog, my reading glasses were removed off the kitchen table and created into a million pieces and the handle off the bucket chewed into a zillion pieces. I call that successful. 

On returning home I had a call from a previous external supervisor whom we have become friends with. She was journeying the coast and called in for a cold drink on a warm day. 

During our conversation she had mentioned ,going out on my own and doing my own thing. Something I had been contemplating and that was my message to trust myself and start the process. As it had been in my thoughts, I already have a name and some pieces to the puzzle are under way let's see where this goes. Love those impromptu moments that lead to a journey of hope and trust. 

Now in 2025 although I started in 2024, I have my business, 

Vicky-Life coach & Colour. It has been a journey to get here and all through it I still have my friendship with Bronni in Australia who has been through all of my moments since we were 15. Those solid friendships are to be truly valued.

The financial support I sought from the government for a startup self-employed business declined after I went on a course and set up my business plan. Not meant to be funded by them. I believe this is perfect.

 I once heard someone mention that it took them two years to find their true path. For me, reflection will reveal whether it will take two years before I am constantly working with others through their transformations. 

Knowing when to move homes or leave jobs and trusting has been a comfort to me to know those decisions were right for me. Following the prompt to leave home at a certain time and go in a different direction to avoid delays, serves me well. Not always aware of the why.

 I was at our intersection from our road onto the main highway when I saw a car approaching from my left, it was travelling slowly but something said “wait”. I waited until the car passed then turned onto the highway to follow it. As I was driving along I thought, do I have phone coverage? Then I thought why does that matter , then I thought of an accident and then I thought nope dont do blood remember. Then coming around the corner was the car in front in a ditch. OH Great, I stopped, put my hazard lights on, got out of the car, approached the female driver and said are you ok. Thank God no blood she said I was going to Westport to get new tires and visit a friend in Denniston. I told her to get in and I will take her to the tyre place. She hopped in a little shaken ,so I calmed her down by reminding her how much worse it could have been as she had passed some big cliff drops coming from Punakiki and had sat nicely in the ditch. I suggested once she got her new tyres that going home and relaxing for the day might be a better option. I didn't think there was much damage to her car. On my drive home and passing the spot she had gone off the road I noticed all the arrow road signs were gone. She must have cleared them all, oh maybe the other side of the car that I couldn't see was a mess. I hope my psychological first aid stopped any shock or trauma and it was only the car that was affected. I do see the positives in things.

It is only when my own stubbornness takes over that I find myself in those situations of I should have listened and acted sooner, I would not be in the crazy of a situation and dealing with the extra, that had I listened I would not be confronted with. I think my school reports may have described me as a slow developer, less talking and more work, focus on the task at hand, less daydreaming, you know those kinds of reports. Mind you if the teachers were aware of astrology they would have known this little Pisces daydreamer.

Though the road has seldom run straight and the landscape has often shifted beneath my feet, I have found a quiet steadiness in noticing the patterns that reveal themselves only in hindsight. Sometimes it’s a fleeting conversation that lingers, a kindness exchanged in passing, or the serendipity of meeting the right person at just the right time—these small wonders accumulating to form the ground I walk on now. There is a gentle alchemy at play, where uncertainty is transmuted into possibility and the routine of daily life becomes a vessel for transformation. Allowing myself to lean into this unfolding, I find courage in curiosity and solace in the knowledge that even the smallest acts—whether sharing laughter, offering help, or simply pausing to breathe—can ripple outward in ways I may never fully see. All the while, gratitude roots me in the present moment, inviting me to trust that each new day brings with it a chance for renewal, a fresh perspective, and the quiet promise of growth waiting to be discovered just beyond the familiar. 

As I settled in for the night realm, I closed my eyes to an image of corridors and small glimpses of light in the dark tunnels not being able to see all. Images of people and images I couldn't quite imagine or understand. I felt calm, no fear or panic and welcomed them in the white light and off to sleep I went. 

I know there is much we do not see or understand but I see glimpses of it every now and then just enough to spark my wonderment of what else is out there. Or right here in front of me and is this part of a parallel universe? That word parallel I still don't fully understand but it keeps appearing these days, another rabbit hole I haven't explored yet.

As I have  come to a realization through silence, that I have over the years surrounded myself with Buddhas.

 My home is surrounded by them at my gate to greet those who enter and keep away those whose intentions are not honest. Buddhas that protect me and my home and land and look over the pond keeping the fish safe from wekas as I saw one heading that way once and thankfully it did not succeed in entering the pond. 

Years ago in Perth I was initiated into magnified healing therapy and the Goddess to that healing modality is Kwan yin . I have been doing my daily journaling with Goddess cards and finally stopped and took notice of who they were and the true meaning they have for me and their messages resonating with me so profoundly. It is easy not to truly recognise what is right in front of us. Like reading a book for a second time you will see something else that you had not noticed in the initial read.

Within the space of silence and not thinking comes those moments of understanding. Then the truth exposes itself. When you think you have mastered the art of not thinking you learn more that you still have been overthinking the overthinking. Mastering no thinking sure takes time and dedication. Always learning and then the growth starts.

These writings are snippets in my life that guided me and allowed me the space to reflect on where , what, how, why, I am who I am today and comfortable in those pyjamas. 

We see the reason for those moments and are able to heal those parts of us that became unbalanced. Digging deep and being honest with yourself along life's journey is key for harmony. We always search for peace and quiet.

It seems those first years are the playground of experiences then as we get wiser they become the lesson. What do we keep and what do we let go of?

I hope this has given you the incentive to reflect on your journey and see the positives out of some of your negatives. Food for thought.

Letting go in the moment to truly look at what is presented with a different lens, may lessen the impact and change the narrative. Be the observer in your life at times it might give you some clarity.

The road may be bumpy at times, find some joy to embrace it. There will always be an answer for it. 

Love & light

Vicky Humphrey